Is It Me?

Have you ever stopped to ask yourself, “Am I the problem”?

I know it sounds harsh, but sometimes WE are problem.

How many times have we blamed others or our circumstances for the things we’ve said or the way we reacted?

This was a harsh realization for me.

As I’ve read devotions and Bible verses related to parenting and self-control, I realized that my kids, my spouse, and my circumstances are not the problem.

Don’t get me wrong, just because they aren’t the problem doesn’t mean they are always in the right.

So, what do I mean?

What I’m trying to say is that God speaks to our heart about areas we need to change.

Yes, your kid calling your name for the millionth time while you’re changing the baby’s poopy diaper is frustrating…

Yes, piling bills not matching the income can cause stress…

Yes, your husband whistling his favorite tune when you have a headache can press your buttons…

But that doesn’t mean that we are entitled to lose self-control of our emotions by reacting negatively to each scenario.

The people were surrounded by might be making sounds that are irritating to us in the moment, but they aren’t the reason we respond with negative words or tones.

The piling bills aren’t the reason we are lashing out, overeating, or neglecting to call on God.

Each of us has a CHOICE.

God gives us a choice in every single response.

Yes, life, marriage, parenting, work, etc. has ups and downs.

The Bible tells us:

However, it’s our choice how we will respond to everything that comes our way; good or bad.

“Whoever has no rule over his own spirit Is like a city broken down, without walls.”

– Proverbs 25:28 NKJV

Basically, we need to pray that God helps us exercise the spirit of self-control.

On top of that, we need to put it into action.

Every day. Every moment. Every situation. We need to practice holding our tongue or removing ourselves from something that could cause us to lose control.

So the next time you feel the urge to frustratingly tell your child (or husband) to be quiet, stop to ask yourself these questions:

“Why is this really bothering me?”

“Is my kid really doing something wrong or am I just being easily irritable?”

And even if you are stressed about something else that is causing you to be easily irritable, you can still stop yourself from responding negatively to those around you.

Remember:

“For God will never give you the spirit of fear, but the Holy Spirit who gives you mighty power, love, and self-control.”

– 2 Timothy‬ ‭1‬:‭7‬ ‭TPT‬‬